I'm the victim of myself, Just for Fun, Randomness

My hat is off to two people who don’t even exist!

I have to admit, I am AWFUL when it comes to some of the skills and traits I give my fictional characters. Except maybe Emma, while my husband can fly fish as good or better than Paul and Marcus, I’m about as hopeless at it as poor Emma who tries but heaven help her, she just can’t. But some of the others, well, I’ve graciously given them the skills I wish I had. Two that come to mind right off are Madison and Juliet. For the truth is, I cannot paint worth crapola. And last night only proved it.

About two weeks ago I passed a store while navigating an unchartered part of the city for me. The store was called Pinot’s Palette. Intrigued, when I got home, I googled it and thought. “Oh, that would be fun.”

And don’t get me wrong, it was, but I am NOT an artist, and for your entertaining pleasure, I have included some pictures of my first public attempt at painting…

The object was to paint a schooner–the name of the wagon pioneers used. Here’s how it is supposed to look:

Oklahoma-Pride-large.jpg

First, she said to paint a straight line across the bottom third of the canvas:

Line

Then she gave us very good directions about drawing lines to make the “box” part of the wagon and the scallops along the top. I didn’t think it could even be possible to mess this up, but…

outline

 

It was passable, and actually what I’d consider fair, until I got the to last “scallop” then oops… I think I’d made them too close together, thus resulting in having to make the last one giagantic in order to reach the back edge.

Then we were told to fill in the background red. Which was perfect, I thought, I can cover up and “re-construct” my scallops. So I did…

Sort of fixed

 

The problem is that I had to paint down in order to fix the scallops, and when I did this ingenious maneuver, it shrank the size of the canopy (duh!) and suddenly it was too small in comparison to the wooden bottom, leading me to have to paint lines lower to show the edge of the box. (Later, and I don’t have a good picture of it, trying to paint the canopy in a way that would hide the horizontal red line going through it was a bear!).

Then as you can see, we did the ground.

At this point, I looked at what I had, then turned to my friend, who is so comfortable as she paints that she’s eating a sugar cookie, and said, “This is an awful disaster. I can only imagine what the finished product will be like.”

Sweet friend that she is, she looked at my painting, shrugged and said, “Don’t worry, you’re more a Brooke.”

“A Brooke?” What in the world?

“Yeah, wasn’t it her who claimed to have painted those atrocious paintings in the drawing room?”

Oh my lands. I knew it was looking bad, but not THAT bad!

Next came filling the canopy, which was another disaster because I somehow managed to drag the paint over the top edge of the canopy and onto the red…

Almost done

So I tried to fix it by redefining the red outline…and added the wheels.

Wheels

 

With now such a lovely outline along the top of the schooner, I knew when we did the final touches to the background I’d have to blend that into the rest or I’d never live down such a mess.

finished

 

We were told to mix a bit of black and a lot of red to make “plum” to do the corners of the red and as you can see mine came out black. I guess there were tornadoes in the area that day. Otherwise, I can’t explain it.

Though I cannot paint worth beans, I had a great time and I’d strongly recommend that if any of you have anything like this available to go do where you’re at, go do it. Even if it’s just once, it’s definitely an experience to have. I never knew I wanted a pioneer schooner hanging in my living room, but now I have one, and I must say, I’m starting to like it even if I’ll have to stash it in the closet whenever company comes to visit.

 

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