Characters, His Yankee Bride, Mr. Henry Hirsute, My own craziness, Randomness

Frank Discussion: Is this too much leg?

[Disclaimer, not for the squeamish or faint of heart.]

In January, on a hunch that I’d deviated from my previous pattern card when choosing book covers, I decided to have mine redone where the focus was more on the dress/background and no faces could be seen just as I’d done in the past. [Side note here, my husband still thinks the original Regina was super hot… Really? This just makes me shake my head, but whatever.]

As I was discussing with Lily Smith about what I’d like to see and she was sending me samples, I was also plaguing the inbox of a few of my readers who have dared allowed themselves to offer me opinions about things in the past. How fortunate for them, right?

I sent them the new idea for the lady to portray Carolina on the cover his His Yankee Bride:

Red Beauty

I don’t have rights to the original photo so I can’t post it, but without the writing there, it looked like you could see more leg, to be sure, and one of the reactions was, “Isn’t that a little leggy?”

Why yes it is, Carolina is the mother of three scandalous hoydens and a bit of an unruly one herself who probably would have loved to have sat positioned like in a chair in the middle of a field if she thought it would get John’s attention.

But Carolina isn’t my only “leggy” character. I have another who seems to have stolen the show:

Mr. Henry Hirsute!

This young man has no problems showing his legs to anyone:

Scandalous I tell you! Given the time period in which he is being discussed, he really should be more mindful of showing certain body parts to the world. But he doesn’t seem to–he shows off his long, strong legs, hairy abdomen, even his derrière, which let’s face it could use a trim. Manscaping, anyone?

I’ve personally had three of these: Harry (very original, I know), Mr. Fuzzinelli, and Quatzequatel (named after a famous Aztec god). Harry (who we could never agree on how to spell this: Harry like the man or Hairy like the adjective…) died a very tragic death: he was eaten by his own food. We dug a grave, had the funeral, laid him to rest and waited two years before getting Mr. Fuzzinelli who ODed. No kidding. At the pet store, they tell you that you need to put a sponge in their box so A. they can drink and B. it does something for the air, makes it more humid, I think; because we all know in Oklahoma there’s not a drop of humidity in the air…  What they don’t mention is that it needs to be a certain kind of sponge and that a regular old kitchen sponge will not do. Apparently, the sponges you buy on the cleaning aisle come pre-sprayed with all sorts of chemicals. Chemicals which kill tarantulas. And so it happened, that Mr. Fuzzinelli, spent too much time on and near his sponge that he ODed on the chemicals and died.

Ironically, this happened while we were away for a weekend and someone else was taking care of him. How wonderful for us that they saved his body… And so, another grave was dug, funeral had, and he was lain to rest.

Because the people felt so bad, they got us another one!

Sadly, my heart just wasn’t in it to take care of another one and he didn’t last too long. Just a few weeks, I think. I fed and watered him, but that’s about it. I just took care of him because he was there, I had no real attachment, so when he died, I didn’t try to investigate his cause of death, just gave him a flush and banished his tank to the attic.

I’m heartless, I know.

From time to time, when I get upset, Bob will ask if I need another hairy spider, if that will cheer me up.

No, no spiders. In fact, no spiders are welcome in my home any longer. When I was younger, I’d kindly remove them from whatever surface they were on and put them outside. These days they get the TP treatment. One in particular…

Last night after watching a very upsetting movie I went to bed. After tossing and turning a bit, I got up to go to my office and work for a while longer. And that’s when I saw him! That vile creature that dared allowed himself into my home without permission!

Brown Recluse

The picture isn’t very good, so it looks like a regular spider, but he’s not. He’s a Brown Recluse (or a fiddle back), one of the worst kinds of spiders there are! (My husband snapped this from about 10 feet away LOL) I don’t know all the details on what’s in him that does this, but his bite will kill your skin and the tissue underneath–then the tissue all around it will also die and the wound will keep getting wider and deeper. People have died from these and the pictures are horrible!

I was able to keep my calm so not to scare him and make him run where I couldn’t get him, but I did call down for my husband to bring me some toilet paper, ASAP, with which I killed the menace–then made an overnight call to the exterminator who will be coming out today if I have to go track him down and bring him here myself!

Anyone else have any plans for the day as exciting as mine? What about leggy creatures, who do you think is more appealing to look at: Carolina lazing on her plantation or the eight legs of a spider?