As most of you have figured out by now, I was on vacation last week…without Internet. It was brutal, but I survived. Anyway, before we left, I went to my kids’ school and collected any work they might need to complete while gone. Which being in Kindergarten and Pre-Kindergarten wasn’t much.
As I was getting everything together at the teacher’s desk, my son runs up to me, points to a girl and says, “Mom, that’s the girl I told you about. The one who goes around telling everyone she’s my girlfriend.”
He’s six. I’m not really worried about this.
But then, the teacher, looks up from her desk and shakes her head, grinning. “Oh, yes. Eddie here is our Classroom Casanova.”
At this moment, I literally pull an Alex and blink. On one hand I’m shocked it’s Eddie who has earned the name of “Classroom Casanova”, my younger son, Henry, is a lot more active and social, the kid has NO enemies and everyone in the class claims he’s their best friend–even the girls (I know this based on many odd conversations at parent-teacher conference that were initiated by, “Oh, so you’re Henry’s mom. Billy–or Suzie–just loves him.) On the other hand, I’m blinking because a mental image of a recent picture I saw of the real Casanova flashes in my mind, and so does his cause of death: in short, he had syphilis like eight times, all of which he medicated himself with mercury. And finally, the last time, it was too much for his body to take and his urethra swelled shut, making him unable to pee… So, yeah, I wasn’t sure exactly HOW to feel about this.
The teacher then proceeded to tell me all about how all the girls in class FIGHT over who gets to sit next to him and how she actually had to have a chat with all the girls a few days prior about how they needed to save their kisses for their moms and dads, and not make “kissy faces” at Eddie.
I must admit, that I found this rather funny as this teacher and I have had a few “chats” over the year due to some rather uncomfortable situations on my end:
“Mrs. Gordon, do you or your husband have a brother named Earl?”
“Well, Eddie has been talking about a guy named Earl at school a lot recently.”
Oh dear! “He has, has he? Good things, I hope.” Seriously, what else is there to say to that?
A few weeks later:
“Uh, I now know who ‘Earl’ is…and a lady named Brooke.”
Panic seized me. I hate it when people I know read my books. I can’t explain it, it just makes me unwell. “Oh?” Did my voice just squeak? I sure hope not.
As it turned out, she hadn’t read my book–at least not all of it–in fact, she only read about a page… See, long ago, I used to print out all the pages of my MS and edit them on paper. Then I’d keep the paper and either print another book for editing on the back, recycling basically. OR I’d let my kids draw on the back. And…uh…yeah, my son had grabbed some of that used paper, drew a picture on the back for someone at school and without me knowing it brought it to school. Fortunately, it was only one page double spaced so there wasn’t TOO much, UNfortunately, the page was not exactly something I’d have willingly given to my sons’ teacher… (or another student, whether they could read or not!)
Needless to say, I scoured my office for any stray piece of paper that had anything to o with my books and shredded them–and now I edit electronically.
But, I am giving away a signed copy of any book from my backlist to the first person to correctly guess what was written on the typed side of that paper.