Random Question for a signed copy of Her Secondhand Groom

What is the strangest–or most unique–phrase you’ve ever been woken up to or said to someone to get them to wake up?


Mine would be: “Don’t kill me!”

Last Saturday, I was in a hotel in Chicago with a friend. The night before, I’d had A LOT of water and orange juice to drink. And I mean a lot. So first thing that morning, I had to visit the bathroom. In the adjacent room, the shower was going, and without thinking about it, I flushed.  Just a split second before I did, someone in the other room flushed, too. Between all the water pressure of the shower and the dual flushes, the water in our commode didn’t go down so I did what anybody would do: I flushed again.

HUGE mistake.

The water may not have moved last time, but it sure moved this time. But instead of going down, it came up. UP, UP, UP, it came and I swear my eyes probably looked like they were about to pop right out of my head as I stood paralyzed as this water kept rising.

Then it happened. It rose out of the bowl and came cascading down the side.

And yes, like all women in this situation, I shrieked.

In less than three seconds, water covered the entire bathroom floor–followed immediately by every towel, washcloth, bathmat etc I could find.

That’s when I walked out of the bathroom and said those words: “Don’t kill me,…” to my barely awake roommate as it was still rather early and I didn’t want her to be surprised if she woke up and a man armed with a plunger was in the room.

Fortunately, the maintenance man got it fixed quickly enough, but I have to admit that I lived in fear of flushing the entire rest of the weekend.

15 thoughts on “Random Question for a signed copy of Her Secondhand Groom”

  1. That happened at our house not too long ago. I was so thankful it was mostly regular water and not really gross water. Unfotunately, I didn’t have anyone home to help me.

    As for the question, I frequently wake up saying the first thing that pops into my mind. Usually it begins with “Oh crap!” followed by whatever I have just remembered. Which usually startles my husband but then he goes back to sleep. Monday morning as I was reaching for my glasses on the nightstand I said “Oh crap! Luke (my seven year old) left his glasses at the restaurant last night.”
    With kids I have been woken up by all kinds of crazy things. Like, Mom, I just puked. Or Mom, I can’t find find my DS. Luke is a sleep walker/talker and I have been woken up in the dead of night by him standing next to my bed (which is scary in itself) but then he usually says the strangest things to me, like, “Mommy, I don’t know how to get in the box” or “The spoon needs to go in the sink.” He didn’t even have a spoon. Kids definitely make things interesting.

    1. Kids do make things interesting. I wasn’t asleep, necessarily, but I was resting on the sofa on Sunday night when my older son came in and announced that his younger brother had snuck the scissors into their room and hand cut his hair. I was up faster than a bullet leaving a gun and sure enough, he’d cut a huge hunk out of the front.

      That was the first time I’d been woken up that way, and I hope it was the last.

      Sadly, the puking statement has been issued several times–especially in the middle of the night.

      1. We’ve had a few hair cutting incidents here too. My boys also like to play video games so we get some pretty odd things being said like “Matthewwwwww! Let me jump on your head and then you can throw me.” I think I’ve been woken up from a nap by hearing that one yelled a few times. Then I wind up saying something like “Matthew, just let Luke jump on your head please and be quiet because I am trying to rest.”

  2. It’s probably more me saying weird things to mychildren based on TV shows. I will go into my son’s room to wake him up for school and say “wakey, wakey eggs and bakey” which I got from Phineas and Ferb. With my daughter, I do a line from the Disney movie Princess and the Frog where Princess Tiana (in frog mode) is trying to wake up Prince Naveen (in frog mode) in a log they are hiding in from some alligators. She says to him “rise and shine Sleeping Beauty, the gators are gone.” So I will go into her room in the morning and say “rise and shine Sleeping Beauty” and she will finish it with “the gators are gone.” It’s probably much more entertaining for me than them. LOL.

  3. Reminder to Judy: If Rose would ever, as if she would, invite you to go somewhere with her. Think very very hard and long and even though you would want to say yes, for your safety and sanity…say no. 🙂

  4. I generally wake my girls with some sing-songy thing. I also like the Scripture “How long will thou sleep, oh thou sluggard” since I get up much earlier than everyone else. The one thing I hate to wake up to is “Mom, I’m going to puke!” 🙂

    1. I love that verse, Tami! What fun. Yeah, the “Mom, I’m going to puke” (or already did) makes me cringe. There is just something about partially digested stomach contents that make me unwell.

  5. for me it was ” être avec h c’est l’arbre, sans h c’est l’homme….”orthographic lesson i guess i was so stressed or i dreamed of an interrogation but as soon as my mother said my name i blurted that … she started to smile saying ” correct but first breakfast” ^^;;

  6. Well most people know better then to wake me up but I think the strangest way I have ever been woken up was by my dog who let out a seires of barks and then jumped onto my bed and just stood over me in his protective stance while staring at the door. I found out later that day that there was someone that had broken into a house a couple of blocks over. and my dog seemed to be protecting me.

  7. I guess I would pick when my husband woke me up shaking me saying, “did you feel that?” I thought he meant him shaking me, but apparently it was a small earthquake. Having grown up in Minnsota, now in Cali, it was certainly unique for me!

    1. Having grown up on the west coast, I’d felt a few small earthquakes and only one large one at night. Last fall though, Oklahoma (where I currently live) experienced a string of earthquakes, many at night and I did the same thing to my husband: “Bob! Wake up, it’s an earthquake!” Being a lifelong Okie, it was the first time he’d experienced such and was slightly alarmed. Good times.

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