I’d planned for part two of this series to actually be about my husband’s *cough, cough* romantic side. However, I’ll postpone that post until tomorrow or Tuesday, and instead drag up an old habit: a character interview. I’m having a bit of trouble with Her Imperfect Groom so I need to pull Sir Wallace in here so I can try to understand what is going on in that thick head of his.
So without any further ado, allow me to introduce you all to Sir Wallace Benedict, the hero for book four in the Groom Series, Her Imperfect Groom.
Wallace, did you happen to read the synopsis I wrote for your book?
Are you sure?
Are you positive?
For the third time, yes.
Then why are you being difficult?
I’m not being difficult. *Shoots me a rather smug smile* Actually, I think I’m being the most cooperative hero you’ve written so far, don’t you think?
No, Wallace! I don’t think that at all. You clearly didn’t read the synopsis because if you did, you’d realize you cannot already have fallen in love with the heroine in chapter two. You weren’t supposed to realize this until more like chapter twenty-two. So, due to your unplanned behavior, I have reason to believe you didn’t read a word I wrote.
Correction. I read the synopsis. I just disagreed with it.
*Shrugs* I don’t see the problem, Rose.
*Frowns* Well, it seems to me, you could have this entire book wrapped up in chapter three. No, four. It needs to have four chapters.
And why is that? So it can be an even number that’s easily divisible into an even number of reading sessions?
No. I was thinking in chapter three we marry, then in chapter four we have our wedding night.
Absolutely not! Do you think I write porn?
Well, I don’t. In a manner of speaking, anyway.
*Lifts one eyebrow*
What I mean is, I prefer to use sex only as a means to enhance the plot, not make it literally a quarter of the book.
Then add an epilogue and it’ll only be a fifth of the book.
*Rolls eyes* No. Now, listen here, you better start cooperating or I’ll make you impotent.
*Flinches* You wouldn’t dare.
Oh, wouldn’t I?
No, you wouldn’t. That wouldn’t be the slightest bit romantic and you know it.
Be that as it may, don’t push me or I’ll do it, Wallace.
You can’t do that.
I don’t believe you.
What are you doing?
Typing what? Let me see that clicky box you keep tapping on.
*Pulls laptop away from handsome hero*
Let me see that, or I’ll tell everyone about that mermaid your son just shoved in front of my face.
I don’t care.
You don’t care that your son drew a mermaid, complete with a revealing scrap of fabric across her chest, covering what your son referred to as, “Mom things”?
*Blushes* All right, I care. I swear even G-rated moves are unsuitable anymore. And don’t even get me started on the PG movie we saw a few days ago. Oh my, it was totally in—
Don’t change the subject, let me see what you’re typing. *Grabs laptop and runs across the room* What is this? *Blinks*
It’s called a computer, Wallace. Welcome to 2011.
But what am I looking at?
Oh that? Nothing.
No, it’s not nothing. You’ve deleted “erfect” from the word “Imperfect” on the screen. Why?
Because I’m changing the title of your book.
Her Impotent Groom.
I believe you heard me. Since you insist on not cooperating, and now you’re being belligerent about it, I have no other options left to me.
Yes, you do.
And what would those be?
You could just change the description of the book!
*Blinks* Why didn’t I think of that?! Ahem, I suppose that’s a possibility.
Good. Now make it a reality.
*A slow smile spreading across my lips as a very wicked idea pops into my head…* Wallace, I’m going to give you one more chance. Are you sure you do not wish to comply with the synopsis I originally wrote?
You mean where I spend the majority of the book thinking I’m in love with Jane Cloy, Lady Chattersfield, while both she and Lady Silverton compete to gain my attention, and meanwhile Edwina Banks becomes a friend who gives me female advice so I can win Jane once and for all, but at the last second I realize I’ve fallen in love with Edwina? No. That’s an old and tried storyline. Very boring, if I do say so myself.
All right, fine. You can have it your way. I’ll allow you to realize you’re in love with Edwina in chapter two. And I’ll even change the description on my website, and in the back of all my books within the next day or so. However, you just remember you chose this destiny for yourself, and you’re the one responsible for whatever chaos you find yourself in during this book. In short, your brought this upon yourself.
*Shrugs* I see no problem. As we’ve already discussed this can all be wrapped up in total of four chapters. Oh, and the epilogue. Let’s not forget the epilogue. I’d hate for your reputation to be sullied if someone were to think you write porn…
Four chapters and an epilogue huh?
Yep. That should cover everything.
That’s what you think.
No, that’s what I know.
You seem rather confident, Wallace.
Well, shouldn’t I be? Besides, I’d think with four chapters and an epilogue you could easily use this book for NaNoWriMo.
*Shakes head* You know what, Wallace. I’ll take that challenge. I’ll use this book for NaNoWriMo, where the goal is to write a 50K novel in the month of November. Except, I bet the novel will be far longer than that, 90K words, perhaps. And, I can gaurantee, it’ll be more than four chapters and an epilogue.
What could you possibly find to fill another twenty to twenty five chapters.
Oh, you’ll see.
Rose, I don’t like that look in your eye.
And I don’t like it when my characters misbehave, so I guess we’re even.
Save it, Wallace. You’ll get your wish. However this is not a short story. It will not have only four, conflict-free chapters; and since you’ve already discovered you have feelings for the heroine so early in the book, I am forced to take drastic measures that you may not enjoy. Be warned.
[Please note: due to an unforeseen development with the hero in Her Imperfect Groom, I really am changing the description and plot. A new description should be posted within a day or two. Also, since this has a publication date of January 10, 2012 *gulp* I will be using this book for NaNoWriMo. I will update periodically throughout the month… And yes, Wallace’s curveball in chapter two will result in a string of events he might have rather avoided…unwanted seductions, duels, and widespread rumors, notwithstanding!]